She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
