You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize