how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
