News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
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