i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
My vagina is very pro this idea
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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