Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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