Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
