Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
