Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
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