so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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