so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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