normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
