Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
