Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
