I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
