I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
