are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
