Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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