Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
