i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
