You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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