my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize
