another moral hangover. fuck.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
