He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
His nipple licking is glorious
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
