I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
So squirting runs in the family.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
My Sexting was not on an AP level
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
