I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
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