Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
