i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
