Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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