she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
