i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
