So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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