Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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