google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
