I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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