ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
