it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
