my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
