Texts From Last Night

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  (305): View more from Florida

  I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B

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  (305): I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B http://tfl.nu/epjn
  Replies (35) Good night (1166) Bad night (3499)
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  (650): View more from California

  I feel great

  (650): View more from California

  I just peed on a car

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  (650): I feel great (650): I just peed on a car http://tfl.nu/eq9k
  Replies (8) Good night (2969) Bad night (664)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby

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  (508): Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby http://tfl.nu/pq9s
  Replies (5) Good night (824) Bad night (2833)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  how was your day?

  (404): View more from Georgia

  fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?

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  (850): how was your day? (404): fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i? http://tfl.nu/0urf
  Replies (21) Good night (9330) Bad night (908)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..

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  (814): that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before.. http://tfl.nu/lsu6
  Replies (5) Good night (1135) Bad night (2048)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine

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  (815): im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine http://tfl.nu/4lyn
  Replies (27) Good night (5919) Bad night (1283)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?

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  (806): When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7? http://tfl.nu/xrb5
  Replies (9) Good night (2497) Bad night (1079)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird

  (269): View more from Michigan

  OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO

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  (269): all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird (269): OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO http://tfl.nu/9b3x
  Replies (3) Good night (1976) Bad night (819)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.

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  (512): I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low. http://tfl.nu/zwn3
  Replies (4) Good night (1203) Bad night (657)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick

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  (319): He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick http://tfl.nu/akxs
  Replies (6) Good night (354) Bad night (975)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.

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  (330): Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive. http://tfl.nu/6c5n
  Replies (3) Good night (680) Bad night (311)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.

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  (480): She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine. http://tfl.nu/3eun
  Replies (6) Good night (767) Bad night (321)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style

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  (586): If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style http://tfl.nu/h4ek
  Replies (4) Good night (563) Bad night (283)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.

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  (918): So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus. http://tfl.nu/cj4t
  Replies (2) Good night (596) Bad night (343)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked

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  (716): Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked http://tfl.nu/c2o7
  Replies (3) Good night (665) Bad night (277)

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