I've blown a few things in my day
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
bring money and cleavage
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
