"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my gift to your gina
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
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