as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
