I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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