So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
