Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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