Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
