I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
