hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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