the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
