You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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